We care about what others say.
At first when you read this, it’s kind of a hard accept.
If someone were to say this to you in person, your ego immediately goes into defense mode and says “No I don’t! I can make my own decisions!”
However, if we take a moment to look deep within, we’ll see that on some level we actually do care about what the people around us think and say.
Human beings are social and we always tend to lean on others for advice. We want to make sure that before we make a move, we consult the people around us for a second or third opinion. We need that validation on whether we’re making the right choice.
But what we’re actually doing is allowing other people to make the choices for us. Especially if it’s about our passions or ambitions.
Now before you get more defensive or upset about this, let me be the first to tell you that you’re not alone. And more importantly – it’s not your fault!
We’re trained to not listen to our own guidance.
Growing up, I was constantly looking towards my parents, siblings, or friends for approval. I was so use to asking their opinions in every decision or idea because I needed that validation. I needed to hear that my idea was good or great in order for me to move forward.
During my years of spiritual healing, I came to the realization that I wasn’t really seeking validation. I was seeking love. I was seeking acceptance. I relied on their opinions to feel valued and important.
We’re taught from a young age that we can’t rely on ourselves to make decisions. To not fully trust ourselves completely. That we always need others to help us, which means we forget the most important aspect of our lives.
You can choose your path.
Now I can hear someone out there saying:
“Well we need to seek advice when we need help!”
And this is true. When we’re learning a new skill or need a second opinion or guidance on an important issue, it’s always best to reach out to people who you can trust. People who value you and your dreams.
But when you have to constantly ask other people which direction you should take, it’s because you aren’t confident enough to make the decision yourself.
When we care about the opinions of people who we know don’t really understand or honor us, the negative comments on social media, or the angry people that just want to drag you down to their level – that’s when we have to put a stop to it.
If we constantly allow others to dictate our every move, then we’re not really living for us. We’re living for them. We’re letting them decide our future because we lack confidence or faith in who we are.
Have more faith in yourself.
Understand that at the end of the day, you get to decide what to do with your life. You create your own path. It’s up to YOU on what kind of life you want to lead. We’re not here to be perfect or to solely exist. We’re here to live and learn.
If we can learn to understand that, then we can walk into any decision we make with utter faith.
Sometimes our decisions might scare us. They might not turn out the way we planned. But as long as you can keep an open mind and understand that you’re a student of life, then you’ll always be on the right track.
So how do we stop asking people what we need to do? How do we begin to rely on ourselves?
Here’s how you can start.
I once heard a quote that said: “You can’t miss out on what wasn’t meant for you.”
The moment I heard this, it put everything in perspective. Regardless of what decisions you make, it will the one you most need. You wouldn’t be missing out on anything.
Life will always direct us in the places where we need to be. Which means there’s no right or wrong way if you think about it. There’s only the path that lies ahead.
So the next time you aren’t sure which path to take or what decision to make, sit down with yourself and seek the answer. Trust yourself, have faith in yourself and be confidence in the next step. You’re not meant to be perfect but you are meant to live your life.
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Til next time,